On behalf of all the single, socially isolated people
None of us are happy about the situation. We are in the calm before the storm, facing uncertainty worried about our health, the health of our loved ones and our livelihood. I’m not taking it lightly, nor should we. As a small business owner and mom, I’m nervous. Thank God, I’m healthy and so are my loved ones.
You know what sucks more than the idea of social isolation? Being in social isolation.. alone. Worried about becoming sick and having no one to take care of you.
At the beginning of the weekend, I was messaging a friend about what was going on for the weekend. It was the beginning of the Coronavirus scare and he mentioned he was going to have a “Netflix and Chill” weekend with his husband. I jokingly said I wish I had a husband to “Netflix and Chill” with. I’m lucky I have kids so while there was no “chill” going on, I did have intermittent company on the couch depending on the mood of my daughters.
Now they are with their dad and I’m following the rules and avoiding the public…holed up in my house alone.
Time alone, a bit too much ice cream and my laptop are feeding a great desire for me to speak up for all the single people who may not be willing to call attention to themselves and tell you how we really feel. (I can’t speak for everyone as I’m sure there really are people who prefer being by themselves but I can assure you, none of them have a Myers Briggs that starts with an “E”.)
We are just beginning this time of physical social isolation and the chance of “bumping into someone” and meeting in real life are not likely to happen except for those rebel rule breakers and they are probably avoidant attachment styles anyway so that’s not likely to go anywhere ;).
While you’re taking all the surveys and filling time with meaningless distractions, take some time to ask your single friends if they like online dating.
I’d venture to say a solid 95% would say they really can’t stand online dating and if given the choice would much rather be set up on an old fashioned “blind date”.
Most people know a couple of single people who they could probably introduce. Even if it’s not a love connection, single people know other single people. Don’t stay on the sidelines because you’re worried about the outcome or about what might go wrong. The odds of connecting with someone online and starting a relationship are one in 10 anyway so why not stick your neck out for someone else.
In the five years since my 15 year marriage ended, I’ve been set up on three dates. Two of the three turned into relationships and one was a dud. But, I was grateful each time someone thought of me. And two out of three are much better odds.
So while all of us are spending more time at home this might be a good time to play matchmaker to your single friends, even our introverted friends are going to be ready for social interaction when we can go outside and live our lives again.
And if you need practice playing matchmaker, I’m happy to be your guinea pig.
Update to the original piece, 24 hours later. After one day of social isolation, knowing quite possibly many more will follow, I predict a dating boom is going to take place. (At least one can hope ;)